so silent
i can hear the buzzing
in my ears
a thousand bees
or just the rushing of blood
or a damaged nerve
i hear what there is to hear
in this silence
outside
a bird flies to the feeder
disappointed
by the low seed
floating and leaving no trace
so silent
i can hear the buzzing
in my ears
a thousand bees
or just the rushing of blood
or a damaged nerve
i hear what there is to hear
in this silence
outside
a bird flies to the feeder
disappointed
by the low seed
he had nothing
in his hands to offer
yet she took them anyway
–but my hands are empty
she filled his cupped palms
with cool water
in the dark
they watched
the moon undulate
in his palms
–you have enough
i dream of cracking teeth
wake with an aching jaw
sure that my mouth is full
of broken bits of bone
awash in frothy blood
this news is old
and my eyes cloud
milky and cold
the silence loud
in crystalline air
frogs croak their croaky love songs
–hope to get lucky
Heroes, David Bowie
in millennia
someone will sift
through my ashes
and find that some part
finally turned into
a diamond
it will glitter
in their gloved hand
under dust clinging
to rough facets
looking in
will they see
me or just their
reflection in me
the abandoned heart is beating
it struggles on, but not in spite,
or beating, rather, not to spite
but because it knows nothing else
dreading the silence of the night,
the abandoned heart is beating
to hear itself, steady rhythm
the only comfort it has left
cold darkness too, this loss of words,
a handful of half-told truths–though
the abandoned heart is beating
it will–can not beat forever
these days are soft sun-filled hours
and gray clouds hiding silent stars
that whisper, it is a lie that
the abandoned heart is beating
i can’t wait
to tear out my heart
when we meet
please accept
the gift of my affection
–beating does not cease
easy enough to count
the breaths
to breathe in
breath out
one
feel the tension
in your whole body–
make it tense
on purpose
two
and let it go
feeling muscles
go limp
droop
three
you did this
to yourself
or your body did it
to you
four
and now you have to
find some way to
even it all out
wait, what number–
one
this rain has not watered
the garden of my vocabulary
the opposite
it has dried up my word-hoard
left my tongue and spirit withered
and filled my cheeks with dust