how to write a poem (20170902)

hide and seek is a fine
game when you are ten
and it is summer and hours
after lunch
and before dinner

if you are hiding
you have to decide if you’ll
be the ass who holes up
in a closet in the house
because it’s cooler inside
or go and get a snack
–screw those morons–
while everyone roasts
in backyards
crouching in flowerbeds
or lying under trucks avoiding
black oil stains
and smelling gas
until the world spins

but if you’re it
there is no slacking off
everyone knows if you’re not
doing your job when no one yells
free after four minutes

and those days
when you can’t find anyone
or you’re too slow or too fat
to tag them as they run for
safety
those are long, hot days

Poem 20160419

how to exorcise devils

things you will need:
-holy water or sacramental wine
-communion wafers
-an extra long rosary
-a choir of angels (optional)

offer the allegedly possessed the host
if they only nibble at it or insist
on spray cheese or peanut butter
you know you are dealing with
a high ranking demon

if they are a minor, you can offer
them holy water to choke down
the dry bread, otherwise the wine
have some for yourself

make a double-ended noose
slip one end around your own neck
and one over the possessed victim’s head
stand back to back
count down from 666

run

if the rosary breaks on both necks
you have failed and should start over
if the noose remains intact around either neck
the demon has been expelled
if the noose remains intact around both necks
you are now married

——

National Poetry Month
NaPoWriMo Day 19
How To