daily post (20170713)

Posted on by crow

i long to open you
the way the letter opener
desires to slip between
the thin layers of the envelope
to free the message within

your letters are breaths
whispered, imprints on
time both more substantial
than flame susceptible pages
but as pale as dissolving gossamer

Published by crow

I'm a writer and a dabbler. I live in Washington.

51 thoughts on “daily post (20170713)”

  1. I’m almost there. Hard though not to read the first bit as slitting a throat or artery, and difficult to shake that once I realize that wasn’t your intention. Or was it? Sort of an intentional Dark Crow undercurrent?

  2. This is so good, I decided to forgive the last word you added at end…it’s my most detestable word. Don’t know why. But I overlooked it due to previous content:)

    1. I appreciate that, though if I edit this later, that word seems a little cliche. It’ll probably go the way of Stephen Foster. 😁

    2. In Defense of Glimmer

      I say we double-down on glimmer
      That glimpse of limnal,
      The promise but never the light itself
      Drawing us under, inside,
      The world, our eyes
      chasing a fire that evades our certainty.
      The final salvation of Glim over Glam*
      How could we live
      if everything was so obvious,
      What else would bring us
      to the heart
      of poems?

      *Proto-Germanic *glim-, which also is the base of Old English glæm “brightness”
      (link to drag Charley back into the fray… https://lifeinportofino.wordpress.com/)

      1. that poem you wrote was so slim
        and yet brimming with vigor and vim
        sad, i must say
        i would’na writ it that way
        and mine would be ten shades more grim

    3. Once more, with feeling:

      Gossamer

      Crow strips gossamer
      From garbage,
      Shreds ribbons
      Of plastic wrap, caws with beaky delight
      Shakes tears teases rips
      Rainbows of their oily sheen
      Fair is foul and foul is fair
      Quoth the witches three
      This for the covet
      This for the greed
      This to bejewel
      The nest
      Of Crow

      1. Ah, a Crow poem! MacBeth’s witches are here, as well. Bravo, Q! Crows do love shiny things but aren’t at all particular — jewels and plastic wrap grace their nests.

      3. Sorry, darling, but you know how you are with shiny things. How many times have I seen you inhaling lines of glitter? Your beak looked like a Christmas tree!

      5. I, too, have a poem!

        Your Parakeet

        Witches 3 summon crow
        and tie ribbons to his beak.
        Gossamer strands entrap
        black feathers and slither
        ’round willowy feet.
        Spread your wings,
        my ebony bird,
        cackles a witch in heat.
        Come nest betwixt my legs.
        My Venus Mound
        shall be your Parakeet.

  3. Okay, to quote the noted philosopher and theologian [Qbit], BS! Gossamer is cliche, and possibly was before Nat Cole sang Just One of Those Things. It also lessens the impact of this awesome poem. “…dissolving blood ink.” “…dissolving heartbeats.” “…dissolving edible panties.” Give us (your adoring readers) something to sink our beaks into!

    Otherwise, this IS an awesome poem.

    Forgive the rant…. I just think you’re better than that word.

      2. No, no. Stand by your convictions. I said in a previous comment that if I revisit this poem, that word would be changed.

      3. I wasn’t backing down. I was being amusingly ironic. Well, or making the attempt. Truthfully, I would like gloves off feedback as well.

    1. It is a pretty word. But I think I settled on it rather easily for this poem. But I’m not the best critic of anyone’s work, especially not my own.

  6. This is a breathy, sensual poem, and I enjoyed it very much… “gossamer” works here. I only hope you don’t get a paper cut on your tongue… that doesn’t feel like gossamer at all.

    2. I didn’t know how to link back to you, but I took a whack at gossamer. Take a look and tell me what you think, LOL!

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