vocabulary lesson (20170325)

i close my eyes
and the world
spins backwards
maybe five seconds

i hear the goodbye
again
the “eye” syllable
in the air
impossibly physical
bricklike
solid and hot

i close my eyes again
longer
and when i open them
you haven’t said goodbye
not yet
but your lips part

i shut my eyes
but even if i hold them closed
before i was conceived
before my cell split
for the first time
it would do no good

you never said goodbye
after all
it wasn’t a word you knew